Parenting lives have changed, Home lives have changed, the world has changed. All that was real is now outside the bubble of home. We spend our days getting up, watching some random shit on Netflix, getting a sweat on with Mr. Wicks (and I don’t mean knocking one out!), showering & changing and then doing the basic school work, And I’m no teacher! (although I did once have to red pen my teacher mates, children’s homework as she was behind in her marking!).

As a family of 4 children I have to get them out, yes I do! otherwise, my house will resemble a broken chocolate eggshell from Easter.

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You know the one, you spend days shopping for the bloody egg and struggle to remember who likes what, then once the bunny has delivered… you watch the excited faces of you children open the box, only to discover one of the boxes must have been run over by a fork life driver back at the warehouse, but still got to the shop and put on the shelf! only for you muggins to buy it then see the bottom lip of your child wobble as they see their gift of a broken egg.

So to the horror of my children I have said no to scooting, cycling, making a racket in the park or generally being doughnuts this as I do not want to draw attention to ourselves as is whats required by our great leaders but mainly me and 4 of the kids on our bikes is a recipe for disaster.

It’s not their fault, as they are children and stuck indoors all day is a challenge and they do mostly comply but what does get on my wick, they are children and can not see their friends or at least be 2 meters away (circumference) but the groups of over 60s in their multi-coloured fruit-themed cycle sport lycra like wolf packs burning it up the roads and cycle lanes or the new wave electric scooter silver surfers flying down the pavements.

Our 30-minute stretch of legs ended up being 50 minutes due to having to stop every 2 minutes to allow the traffic flow of these groups!

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So now my second gripe, like in the old ’70-’80s council-run housing area’s I have said “NO BALL GAMES“, again following the rules of going for a leisurely walk, so what do I see, Dads & Mums kicking a ball about with “jumpers for goalposts” or children out in the skate park, playing ball and also skating then watched buy picnicking parents!.

I don’t want to sound a spoilsport or grumpy as I’m trying to be “good” as we get noticed as a big family, recently we are getting judgemental looks when on our walks or food shopping (well G is not allowing me near the big shops but she is getting sick of the looks for having a trolly of food but that’s for us and her mum!) If people just followed the rules the police would not have to pull people out of the sea for swimming or sunbathing or stop them to check where they are going.

Ok, I’m certainly not saying no to cycling or the scooting or to the parents like me trying to bring some normality to this lockdown but just be more discrete, and be more respectful to the families having a walk, to the families who will get out the way if you ring your bloody bell! (normally on the handlebars) and please don’t cycle past at 50 mph!.

We are all in this together and we can all get through it but let’s not take the Piss … Please.

By the way my thighs are still burning Mr. Joe Wicks!